The English Spot: Humor Spot: Fate

09 April 2009

Humor Spot: Fate

When a lonely frog consults a fortune-teller, he's told not to worry. "You are going to meet a beautiful young girl," she says, "and she will want to know everything about you."

"That's great!" says the excited frog. "When will I meet her?"

"Next semester," says the psychic, "in biology class."

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Podcasts (work in progress)

To improve your English, it’s important to find ways to surround yourself in English-language sources. One of the great ways is to listen to podcasts and on the internet, these types of podcasts are not lacking!! Here are a some that could be quite interesting for you to follow. You can download them directly from their respective homepages by clicking on the links (in bold) below, or on iTunes. Text in blue is British English. Red is North American English. Green is Australian English.

NOTE: I’m still working on completing this list so check back as I keep updating it. (Updated 27 Apr 14)

Learning English Podcasts (all the podcasts are free, though some sites may have learning guides that require paid membership. However, you can still effectively learn from the podcast without these learning guides.):

BBC World Service: 6 Minute English – learn and practice expressions for everyday situations
BBC World Service: The English We Speak – make the English you speak more natural by looking at different everyday English expressions and slang in a fun 3-minute programme
BBC World Service: English at Work - 5 to 7 minutes long podcast where you can get the phrases you need to succeed in the business world and avoid embarrassing mistakes with colleagues and clients
British Council: Elementary Podcast, Series 1, 2 & 3
British Council: Big City Small World, Series 1, 2 & 3 – In this audio soap set in London, a group of young people from around the world share their lives over a cup of coffee.
British Council: Overcooked – (audio and video) This series provides an introduction to British food. The culture develop around food can reveal a lot about them; providing insights into their personality, values and beliefs
British Council: Britain is Great – (video podcast) This series of video shows different aspects of the best of Britain. They’re not just about the country, though. There are lots of exercises to help you improve your English. Videos are lively and fast-moving – best if you’re a confident learner of English.
Podcasts in English - Podcasts in English is for students/learners of English who want to improve their speaking and listening skills. The pie team have over 20 years of EFL (English as a Foreign Language) and ESL (English as a Second Language) teaching experience with the British Council in Asia, Africa and Europe. As well as the podcast listenings, there are transcripts of the podcasts and worksheets which will provide comprehensive help for all four language skills to aid your learning
Listen to English – learn English – Two short (5 minutes or less) podcasts every week in clearly spoken English will help you to improve your listening skills and learn new words and expressions. Many podcasts are linked to grammar and vocabulary notes or to quizzes or exercises. (Note: Excellent site, however the last podcast dates from Jan 2013)
Business English Pod – this is an extremely well done site and worth the cost for those who are truly motivated.
ESL Pod – probably one of the best podcasts for learning American English, highly recommended!
VOA (Voice of America): Learning English Podcast – Learning English using a limited vocabulary and are read at a slower pace. Great for elementary to pre-intermediate learners.
VOA: Words and Their Stories – Idioms and expressions that many learners of American English find difficult to understand
Effortless English Podcast - Learn tips and strategies to improve your spoken English. Also learn about American language and culture.
Australia Network: Vodcasts– this link will send you to a great variety of video podcasts from the land Down Under. There are complete courses available but no new podcasts have been produced since 2011.
Slow English – A podcast about Australia for learners of English, spoken slowly by a native speaker.
Dig Into English – For intermediate to advanced learners. Dig into English’s interesting and fun (and free!) podcast episodes help you learn natural English expressions and improve your vocabulary.

News & Politics:

BBC World Service: Global News - The best stories, interviews and on the spot reporting from around the world. Listen to up to 30 minutes of highlights from Newshour, Newsday and The Newsroom. Compiled twice a day from the 24 hour News coverage from BBC World Service.
BBC World Service: From Out Own Correspondent - Every week correspondents, journalists and writers from around the world report on the stories behind the headlines, often bringing a personal perspective to them.
BBC World Service: Documentaries - An in-depth look at stories and issues from around the world. This podcast offers you the chance to access landmark series from our archive.
BBC Radio 4: The Best of Today – (2 to 11 minutes) Insight, analysis and expert debate as key policy makers are challenged on the latest news stories.
NPR (National Public Radio) Topics: Story of the Day - Funny, moving, exceptional, or just offbeat -- the NPR story people will be talking about tomorrow. The best of Morning Edition, All Things Considered and other award-winning NPR programs.
VOA: Issues in the News - Join us each week as prominent Washington D.C. correspondents discuss topics making headlines around the world.

Business News

BBC World Service: Business Daily – Examining the big issues facing the global economy. Business Daily Demystifies the world of money.

Culture & Society:

BBC Radio 4: In Our Time with Melvyn Bragg - Melvyn Bragg and guests discuss the history of ideas – including topics drawn from philosophy, science, history, religion and culture
BBC Radio 4: Thinking Allowed – Laurie Taylor explores the latest research into how society works and discusses current ideas on how we live today.

Natural Sciences:

BBC World Service: Discovery - Discovery explores today's most significant scientific discoveries and talks to the scientists behind them.

Science & Medicine

BBC World Service: Science in Action - Explore scientific research and its impact on science as well as its implications for all of us.Science in Action is a magazine programme that pulls together the science issues of the week and delivers breaking science news from the just-released journals.
BBC Radio 4: Inside Health - Demystifying the health issues of the day that confuse us. Inside Health, with Dr Mark Porter, will be offered in this download, as well as additional related programmes from BBC Radio 4.

Technology: (en travaux)

BBC World Service: Click – For the best debate on global technology, social media and the internet

Cooking: (à venir)

Linguistics: (à venir)

Quotes from 'The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes' by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

“Life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of man could invent. We would not dare to conceive the things which are really mere commonplaces of existence. If we could fly out of that window hand in hand, hover over this great city, gently remove the roofs, and and peep in at the queer things which are going on, the strange coincidences, the plannings, the cross-purposes, the wonderful chains of events, working through generations, and leading to the most outre results, it would make all fiction with its conventionalities and foreseen conclusions most stale and unprofitable.”

“Women are naturally secretive, and they like to do their own secreting.”

“You see, but you do not observe. The distinction is clear.”

“It is an old maxim of mine that when you have excluded the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth.”

“He is not a bad fellow, though an absolute imbecile in his profession. He has one positive virtue. He is as brave as a bulldog and as tenacious as a lobster if he gets his claws upon anyone.”

“A sandwich and a cup of coffee, and then off to violin-land, where all is sweetness and delicacy and harmony.”

“My life is spent in one long effort to escape from the commonplaces of existence.”

The English Spot

09 April 2009

Humor Spot: Fate

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